Before You Set One More Goal… Think About This
Hi Friends! Happy New Year! I have something for you to chew on. What do you think about this...
If you only had a finite amount of resources to work on one goal for this year, what would it be?
If you only had a finite amount of resources to work on one goal for this year, what would it be?
This is the time of year when we all throw ourselves at the mercy of our new years morale and motivation and we go goal-crazy.
Now, I'm not saying don't set any goals this year, I'm saying, pick one. One. ONE. Just one.
Pick one area to get clear about, with one goal, and focus on it. All. Year. Long.
People often get derailed because they have five, six, seven goals at any point. If each of those goals are clearly actionable, (which means they have specific steps, are measurable and timed, and have success clearly defined ahead of time) they should also have multiple sub-steps in each.
"A high quality and realistic goal has clear actionable steps that build on the success and work of the previous steps."-Kasey
If you've got six goals for 2023 (and you know what I mean— save money, eat right, sleep well, make new friends, be kind to myself, and leave work on time), each with four actionable sub-steps, you now have one thing to do every 1 hour of the day for 24 hours. You'd have to lose sleep to get sleep! That is too many things to do for anyone who does not have a cape AND a personal assistant!
A quality goal is clear, with deadlines and specific steps, and has one mission.
While focusing on one area of your life for a period might temporarily interfere with immediate gratification for a few areas, you put yourself in a position to see sustained, long-term change in a domino effect for multiple areas.
It's like closing all of the tabs on your computer and working on one task. Singular focus. No interruptions. Pride for a job well done. Do that thing so successfully that you will be motivated to make other goals and do them one at a time. You need the sheer euphoria of having set your sights on something and achieved it. You need to bask in the glow of task completion. You need the ecstasy of being proud you went from start to finish. You need the high of the prize.
A quality goal may scare you because it will take you out of your comfort zone.
In fact, all of your goals should produce a smidgen of anxiety because there is something at stake.
It might make you think you're selling yourself short because you'd have so much free time with all of the things you're not doing. You might even think this is all just an elaborate ruse for me to one-up you by encouraging you to set yourself back! But nah.
Anything you determine to be important has risk attached to it, but also reward.
If you focused on just one thing for a sustained period of time, how much better could you do that one thing? How much more reward could you see? How much better could you feel?
Friends, as a therapist, I can tell you the amount of TIME AND MONEY people tend to save when they work on goals this way is fierce! But what about what you could FEEL if you gave up the dead-end game of goal multi-tasking?
A quality goal sets up its own rewards in feelings, time, money, and purpose.
I don't have to give you examples of areas where you've done one thing at a time and been rewarded for it (but I will). Think about listening to someone speak. We limit distractions. We might take notes. We ask questions if we need clarity. Most of us know what happens if we are texting, driving, or have too many tabs open when other people are speaking to us. We lose efficiency, focus and time. We miss the message.
When we do one thing at a time, we keep efficiency and momentum. But here's an even bigger win: self-reinforcing systems are created when they are attached to pride and pleasure.
We set more goals when we are happy to fulfill them.
If you set yourself up to do one clear thing, successfully, you may be happier to keep at it. No interruptions. No obstacles. No self-sabotage. Just action + satisfaction for one area. When your one area is complete, you can then move onto other areas and refine your system.
Friend, That's my challenge for you for 2023—pick one domain and create one goal.
What do you want to consider before picking and sticking to an area, you ask?
For now, this is the question you'll want to answer:
In what area of my life do I want to be more aligned with my integrity?
By this I mean, everyday, every week, every month, and every year, you decide what is important to you. You then do things that move you in that direction, keep you aligned, or within your integrity.
If you value health, you may go to bed by 10pm or ride your bicycle in the mornings. If you value financial literacy, you may read books on the subject, or invest in a checking account with $0 in fees and no minimum balances. If you value yourself, you may say 'yes' to activities that match your skillset and 'no' to requests that exceed your boundaries.
If you are staying within your integrity, what you consider important, the priority level, and the energy you give it all match. When those things don't match, i.e. you say you value saving money, but you exceed your budget every week, you are living outside of your integrity! We want to stay within our integrity, so our lives have value, meaning, and are purposefully lived.
Let's get into alignment for 2023. We can help each other.
Once you have a goal, sit with it. How does it feel? What will you be able to do if you meet this goal? In what ways will you be able to give more generously? How would your assumptions about the world change, if you could accomplish this thing? This is why we pick only one thing to focus on.
Don't worry about the specific steps, yet. We will go over this more in later articles.
No gimmicks. Nothing sleezy. Just clarity, dedication, and busting though barriers as they arise. I'll be checking in to help you get there— wherever you want to go. I have a goal of my own to work on.
We're going to keep talking about our mindset around goals, movement, barriers, and achievement throughout the year.
Don't feel in a rush to get started with the steps, just pick the area you want to focus on. I'll help you with the mindset changes needed to navigate it. Thinking this way....this is the kind of change you need for the long-game, so start now. We can do it together.
Have a particular barrier you want help navigating? Send me an email at kasey@cultureoftherapy.com and let me help you out!
Sending peace and prosperity your way.
xoxo Kasey David
